Dear LPG Food Connoisseurs,   

I am sorry to have to say that, as much as I try, perfection has eluded me yet again this month. I want all readers to know that while I have never managed to poison anyone to date, I appear to be one of those cooks who never quite hit the mark.

I started this month’s independence dish with high hopes, after all, the recipe describes Ichlekli as Turkmenistan’s shepherd’s pie. I can confidently say that I have cooked a recognisable version on many occasions, and although theirs looked visually different, I recognised every ingredient in the list.

I only had to go shopping for the minced lamb, and the proprietor of my local specialist food ingredients shop was spared a visit from me while I tried to get my tongue around one of those ingredients that I can never pronounce correctly.

I prepared the filling without any problems, although it had less liquid than usual; the pastry was the issue. I have to say that one thing that I can consistently produce confidently is a decent casing for a pie, be it short crust or puff, but it was when I put the only two ingredients named for this pastry into the bowl and got stuck in with my fingers, that things went a bit wrong. 

I do that quite often, and you get a feel for when the uncooked version is correct if you make it often enough. I have always had a bit of trouble with quantities measured in ‘cups’, but I asked Alexa and stuck to her version of the amounts of grams involved. I added the water as directed, but they never specify precisely how much is too much. I started with a bit, then added a bit more as you do. However, it looked a bit squishy, so I added a bit more flour. Before I knew it, I had created what looked like perfect short-crust pastry dough. That is what I used, and that is what I got. Having watched the video, I knew it was supposed to be more pliable than that, but worried about making a complete hash of it, I used what I had at that point. The recipe mentioned brushing water over the top, but when I took a look halfway through the cooking, it looked a bit anaemic, so I added what I would have for short crust pastry and did a milk brushing, thus totally changing the look of the thing.

  
According to my taste testers, it tasted perfect, but they never saw the original picture. 

But upwards and onwards…

The Czech Republic celebrates its Independence Day, which happens to occur on October 28th. At that point, I plan to introduce you to something no one can get wrong (I hope), so please join me then for a plate of Smažený sýr. 

CB, Lewisham

CB previews her plans for her next venture into the independent kitchen… 

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… and just in case you don’t understand her frustration, here's a video of Homer Simpson.

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